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Counseling an Abuser: 3 Steps
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This post was written by based on material from in "The Heart of Domestic Violence"

Typically, “why” questions are ineffective in counseling, as people are more likely to blame their sin on the behavior of another. This is especially true in the case of abusers. Asking an abuser why he hit his wife will open the door for him to blame her perceived lack of respect or submission, her chastisement of him, or some other aspect of her behavior that provoked him. This is not what the biblical counselor is after. Instead, asking “what” questions provides more specific, accurate, and valuable data. For example, asking the counselee “What did you expect your wife to do after you began calling her those names?” can expose the true desires of the heart. Through “what” questions, the counselor can discover the lust for control, desire for power, and overwhelming pride that is generally driving abusers. With this step, the biblical counselor should begin to look out for true, biblical repentance.

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5 Resources for Helping Sexual Abuse Victims
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A heartbreaking trend began recently on social media. In the wake of the abuse exposed in the entertainment industry, women across the globe started speaking out about the harassment and abuse that they too have endured.

Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram are virtually overwhelmed with the hashtag #metoo, identifying people who have suffered at the hands of an abuser. As each high profile case hits the headlines, our hearts are burdened by the victim’s suffering and we long to help.

Over the years, IBCD has invited pastors and counselors to share with us how to speak the truth of God’s love tenderly to those who have been abused. The Word of God is a powerful comfort that rescues the weak and needy (Ps 82:1-4). We want you to know that these solid, biblical resources are now located together in one place and can be easily accessed as you seek to minister the love of God.

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Danielle’s Story – Behind the Scenes of an Observation Video
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Daelynn Romo is a wife and mother of three, an active church member and a friend of IBCD. She is also the face of Danielle, a counselee in one of IBCD’s Observation Videos. At the urging of her husband, Danielle comes to seek counsel from her pastor’s wife after an old struggle with an eating disorder re-emerges. We asked Daelynn to talk with us about her experience and to share her own story.

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Learning from King David’s Failure
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We were shocked last week when we heard that Charles had been caught in a pattern of adultery and deceit and had been removed from office. How could such a thing happen to a man who seemed to have it all together, who had successfully passed through the temptations of his younger years, who seemed to have everything a minister could want? Does this mean that his entire ministry had been a lie? Are the books, articles and tapes he produced worthless? Or did something happen to take a man who had been qualified and used of God and ruin him?

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