How Thick is Your Bible?
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After having listened to hundreds of hours of counseling and having read or heard thousands of case session reports, I am convinced that many counselors have Bibles which are way too thin. They need thicker Bibles if they are to be effective biblical counselors. The “thickness” of one’s Bible describes how much of the Bible a counselor knows well enough to be able to use spontaneously in a counseling situation.
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Lessons Learned On Sexual Abuse
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The recent #Metoo movement on social media reminded me of a very dark time my wife and I encountered in our ministry. A missionary, who we knew and trusted for over twenty years, was exposed as a sexual predator. He was respected and revered by churches in the United States as well as thousands of …
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Reformed Parenting
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Many parents struggle with guilt and confusion over how to train their children. Old-school parenting books emphasized discipline derived from the exhortations in Proverbs. The book of wisdom was used to chastise the foolishness out of children. The next generation of parenting books suggested that parents should go beyond controlling their children’s wayward behavior and …
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Martin Luther and Jay Adams
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This year we remember the work of a reformer, Martin Luther, who five hundred years ago dared to challenge the established ecclesiastical authorities when he nailed his ninety-five theses to the church door in Wittenberg. I see many similarities to what happened about fifty years ago when another reformer, Jay Adams, came on the scene …
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Do You Need a Counseling Coach?
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During the first half of this year’s baseball season, Yankee rookie Aaron Judge was a phenomenon. He hit for both power and average, and he was on track to set numerous batting records. During the second half of the season, Judge’s production fell way off. The only record he set was most consecutive games striking …
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Stop Biting and Devouring Each Other!
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A friend of mine once said that it is easy to overlook an injustice until it is our ox that gets gored. This is especially true when it comes to one of the more respectable sins like gossip. When the victim is someone with whom we are not close, we are either unconcerned spectators or …
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Helping Churches to do a Better Job Handling Cases of Abuse
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Sadly, I have been witness to a discouraging pattern in local churches as they handle cases involving abuse. It begins as church leaders are made aware of a situation in which a husband is acting abusively towards his wife, and it has been going on for quite some time. The abuse may include any or …
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Do you keep your commitments – even when it hurts?
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When I was a new believer a dear mentor who had great influence on my life made me aware of Psalm 15:4 which proclaims that the righteous man “swears to his own hurt and does not change.” My friend taught me that there will be times in life when one might regret making a commitment, but that it is necessary to keep one’s word. Or as we read elsewhere in Scripture, “Let your ‘yes’ be ‘yes’” (James 5:12 Matthew 5:37).
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Be Slow To Speak
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In some ways counseling is more difficult than preaching in that the preacher can prepare extensively for his sermon and can control the direction the sermon takes. The counselor may seek to prepare for a session but doesn’t have control over the direction the meeting may take. The counselee may raise a new issue or may be facing a sudden (and unrelated) crisis for which immediate help is required. The counselor must be able to offer answers from God’s Word, which means that he or she must know the Scriptures very well.
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